This blog is difficult for me to write. I've been burned with this very thing. Needless to say, I have learned a very painful lesson, and honestly...glad that I did. So let's jump right in.

During tonight's message at First Baptist Orlando, Pastor David Uth touched on a topic that I have struggled with in the past, and still do. This is not word-for-word what he said, but paraphrased... "Instead of talking "about" someone when you have a problem with them, try talking "with" them."

I am not going into details, on my experience, but I am going to give some observations. Still to this day, I dislike severely confrontations. I remember when I managed a Chick-fil-A. I had to do a large amount of confrontation. It is not fun for me, and I am taking a wild assumption here that there are not many people that would find it fun.

(**Disclaimer: I am using the word "people" in this paragraph not calling anyone out. I am talking to myself as well.**) I see it time and time again. Person A has a problem with person B, and they do whatever means they see fit in order to "call out" that person, but tend to forget the appropriate way of dealing with the problem. Going to that person in private and discussing the matter in which is an issue. How does this help share God's love? How does God look at this? Can the action cause more harm than good?

So, let us keep in mind, we do not have all of the information. I spoke with Scott tonight, and he gave me an example of a situation he was it where a lady wrote a letter to a group of people because he was misquoted by the news media. Scott explained himself to her and told her the situation, and she understood. But did she go and do the correct action to make it right? No.

In my own life, I find that I am a person that will deal with major confrontation issues, but a majority of the time I just let them go. That is something I need to work on. It is the fact that I am completely uncomfortable in those situations. Trust me in saying that I had a situation that happened YEARS ago in which I handled incorrectly and that still comes up to bite me. Did I do what I needed to at the time? Yes. But the person has refused to forgive the wrong doing I inflicted toward him, therefore hindering the friendship from going any further.

If you have never listened or took to heart anything that I have ever said, please take this snippet and apply it to your life. "Instead of talking "about" someone when you have a problem with them, try talking "with" them."

Thank you for reading.

-Ken

Labels: careers, Change in my Life, christ, church, David Uth, experiences, FIrst Orlando, forgiveness, friendships, ministry, Scott Link, stubborn